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Mike's top five other reasons to hire a student this summer.
#5. Your last Jedi apprentice just destroyed your death star.
#4. They can survive all summer on six bags of Itchyban.
#3. It's nice to have someone around who thinks you actually run the place.
#2. They're just fun to have around - energetic, enthusiastic and really gullible.
#1. Then maybe some day THEY might hire YOU.
Image: Michelle Meiklejohn / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
I had a little visit with Dr Ozcan and his wonderful staff on Friday morning to have a wisdom tooth and a mis behaving molar removed against their will. Pretty cool stuff; they put you out, get 'er done and a half hour later you make up, feeling pretty buzzy with a mouth full of cotton. Aside from not getting to keep the cool goggles they give your to wear, here are Mike's top five other things I learned after my dental surgery on Friday.#5. After coming out of an anesthetic a person is more greatly affected by Earth's gravitational forces.
#4. Love it when when my brother phones every 20 minutes from Calgary just remind me how much of a wimp I am.
#3. Not having anything to eat or drink for 12 hours before surgery is only made slightly more unbearable if the office Tim Horton's order arrives just before you go under.
#2. Lying on the couch all day is not as fun as you'd think if all you get to eat is yogurt and broth.
#1. Disappointing to find out afterward that, apparently, 48 years old is the cut off for the Tooth Fairy.
I was reading that Danny Bonaduce is teaching classes in L.A. on how to be a morning radio star! Maybe you thinking about signing up. Maybe you are destined to become a morning radio DJ (maybe not). Mike's top five signs you are destined to become a morning radio star.#5. Your default home page is Perez Hilton, TMZ or MSN's weird News of The Day.
#4. By about 2 in the afternoon you find yourself groggy and in need of a nap.
#3. You've seen Howard Stern's movie Private Parts, so you already know exactly how everything works in radio.
#2. You have a good head for math. “2 double double, 1 single double, 1 double single, 3 toasted everything, 2 with cream cheese, 1 plain with 2 margarine on the side.”
#1. Insatiable appetite for lunch and dinner foods around 7 o'clock in the morning.
I went fishing at Ferguson Lake this weekend and actually caught a fish! Usually I'm way into September before I even get a bite! There were a few issues however. Mike's top five problems with the whole family going fishing.#5. Mom, making everyone wash their hands EVERY TIME they touch something gross.
#4. Your eight year old wearing a leach mustache.
#3. Realizing you've been fishing for over an hour and you haven't gotten around to putting your own hook on yet!
#2. The kids constantly giggling every time you say “pass me the Wholly Bugger”.
#1. The kids letting everyone with in shouting distance know. That's the first time you've ever caught a fish that was actually bigger than your bait!
It's Bike to Work Week! Biking to work may present a few problems for some people. Mike's top five problems with biking to work.
#5. Forgetting it's also Take Your Wife to Work week and having to double all the way to work.
#4. That nice wet strip up the middle of your back that no one tells you about til the day is almost over.
#3. Can't stop singing Queen's "I ride my bicycle.." song.
#2. Keeping two double-doubles and a single-single in the little basket without getting the Timbits wet.
#1. People spraying you down with Febreze all afternoon because that “pat-your-pits dry with paper towel when you get there”, just isn't doin the trick anymore.
Governments and law makers are starting to crack down on eco-experts (people selling themselves as experts at greening businesses and organizations). I guess some of these people are frauds. Mike's top five signs your eco-expert might be a fraud.#5. Refers to that huge oil spill in the Gulf as an “Ooopsie”.
#4. Thinks David Suzuki is a good guy, but he prefers Honda and Harley.
#3. Where it used to say F-350 on the side of his truck, someone has pasted a piece of paper with the word Hybrid written on it.
#2. He's the guy that set up the city of Victoria's sewage treatment system.
#1. Apologizes for being late; had to stop for gas, twice on the way over.
#5. Switch from Turtle Wax to SPF 45.
#4. Hide all your camping gear, before the kids find it.
#3. Stock up! It's called the “May 2-4” weekend for a reason.
#2. Spend $75 on a fishing license and fishing gear, just to end up at the Save On fish counter by Sunday night anyway.
#1. Fill every container you own with gasoline, before the price goes thru the roof at 5pm Friday!
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